Hi honey, I'm home.

Hello everyone! I bet you were wondering where in the blaze I've been. Well, after a long and crazy year of blogging, it came time for me to take a little break from the business for a while..

So I jetted off to South America to do some trekking in Patagonia for a few weeks, chilled out (literally) near some glaciers, hung out with penguins, and travelled to the southern most city in the world. Hopefully, I haven't lost too many of you in my absence but I'm revitalised and ready for another holiday season of blogging from the frontlines in Chicago for the next month.

So to kick off my first blog post back from holidays, I was surprised to read The Army general of U.S. forces in Northern Iraq has banned pregnancy among military personnel in his command, even among married couples. Basically, if you get knocked up on deployment you will be court martialied. Ouch.

In other news, Tom Brady and Giselle Bundchen have named their new baby Benjamin.

Not to mention talk of placenta smoothies and placenta holiday revenge...

But if you are really stumped on what to get your childless friend for Chrissie this year, how about Yotaro, a Japanese baby simulator?

Nothing says "Merry Christmas" like a stuffed animal bear with a 'baby' face projected on it

It's an order: American soliders must shed their baby weight

Women might as well just give up on life now.

Just when you thought standards of beauty for post-baby mums couldn't possible get more unachievable, it seems that new mothers in the U.S. military are subject to pressures that most of us can avoid because our jobs don't demand it.

Enlisted US soldiers have six months postpartum to meet Army weight standards and pass the Army Physical Fitness Test (APFT). Otherwise, they can be flagged and ultimately lose their jobs. Until recently, women started physical training with their regular units six weeks after delivery, outnumbered by fit and unsympathetic men and commanders with no experience in training soldiers who are also new mothers. "They look down on you, no matter how good a soldier you were before," said Warrant Officer Jacey Martin, a new mother and soldier at Fort Bragg.

According to the Defense Women's Health Research Program, more than half of new mums fail their fitness tests and about one-third don't meet the weight and body fat standards within six months. Apparently, there are some postpartum PT (physical training) programmes, however, many PT instructors have not been trained in techniques for working with new mums.

Um, not so much.